In my last newsletter, I lamented the tyranny of choices available to us nowadays and the resulting stress it can cause. Two weeks later, I stand by that basic premise. But one reader added an insightful layer to the conversation when he responded with the following:

“In my opinion, making decisions is one of the best ways we learn. Test, iterate, test again, iterate, etc. Having an abundance of choices can lead to great learning opportunities.”

His words were rattling around in my head when I read this line in Emily Freeman’s book about discerning when it’s time to leave a “room” in your life:

“What matters more than the decisions you make is the person you have become and are becoming.”

These two insights reminded me of a bad habit I possess, which is to place far too much emphasis on getting decisions “right” and not nearly enough emphasis on how I’m being formed in the process of making them. 

Anybody out there with me?

If not, I apologize; this newsletter isn’t going to be much help to you.

If so, here are a few questions to ponder:

1. What’s a difficult decision you are wrestling through right now?

2. What are you learning about yourself in the process?

3. What relationships are being started or strengthened as a result of this decision-making journey?

In the spirit of vulnerability, I’ll share my answers:

1. A difficult decision I’m wrestling through? Where to send my oldest son to high school.

2. Lessons learned in the process? I’ve gained insight into my personal core values and how my own high school experiences shape my hopes for my son, both helpfully and unhelpfully. 

3. Relational impact? This discernment process has caused me to grow closer with my wife, my son, and several close friends I’ve been leaning on for counsel. Also, my school district “research” has brought me into contact with some wonderful new people and perspectives. 

So while I still rue all the choices we face in our modern world, I can appreciate how God often uses them to teach me lessons, strengthen relationships, and grow me closer to Him.

Thank you fellow travelers!

With today being Thanksgiving, it feels like an appropriate time to thank each and every one of you for traveling with me these last six months. Your time is valuable and your leadership content choices are abundant – so it means the world to me every time you carve out space to read a newsletter or listen to a podcast. And the fact some of you go a step further by texting, emailing, or calling to let me know how something I’ve shared has landed with you…well, just know I don’t take any of it for granted. 

Have a wonderful Thanksgiving and we’ll talk soon.